Friday, February 6, 2009

In Thirty Years?

What if it will take
Another thirty years
For me to reach perfection
But I don't get the chance
To live another thirty years?


Ocir said...

Weissheit und Aufmerksamkeit sind von Bedeutung. Nicht die Perfektion!

Sophia said...

Wie ist Weissheit? Ist diese Kenntnisse?

Anonymous said...

You find truth in beauty, is this not also wisdom to the one found it where it is?

How about if these ideas do not conflict, yet work together perfectly in truth?

Sophia said...

I don't think they conflict at all, actually. :)

Anonymous said...

And because they do not conflict, they offer depth and breadth to understanding. That is, the timeline collapses to the Now, the only time in which you will experience your perfection.

That is the wisdom of valuing rightly. If you value peace, you set a path to it. If you value the beautific vision, you will be bound by even a poignant beauty and its ensuing tragic aspect, which is essentially only a limit or a perception you have given value to.

Once I heard this idea: Neurosis is a substitute for legitmate suffering. I think it is true. Once we stop ping-ponging in our minds about our deepest fear and actually let go and look at what we are fearing and resisting. You will no longer be a seeker. The teacher in you will come forward and the wisdom you seek will be coming from within continuously. You are that. You just have to decide to let it be so for you. Your ability to tell the truth about how you hinder yourself around that admission will be the only measure worth evaluating. And when you tell the truth about yourself for the first time, that will be all you need to joyously be in full disclosure. It will be so intense and yet so liberating to overcome that little inhibition keeping you from what you thought was outside of you. Perfection, awakening, your authentic personhood. Whatever you want to call it.

Sophia said...

I don't really think it is outside of me. I believe it's inside of me. It's inside everyone. It is everyone. It's just realizing that that is the hard part. I have lots of ideas.

I have this feeling that one has to improve oneself, to purify oneself, to realize it. Maybe I do too much reading. But the vibrations, if impure, can't aspire to higher levels.

What is legitimate suffering?

I decide to be open to anything and to "let it be so", but where is the change?

(P.S. Thanks for your input.)

Anonymous said...

It is in you, but seemingly not of you, so the activity is acceptance. Another word for this is self-forgiveness, overused by the self-help gurus such that it is turned into a word without meaning. In overuse the concept itself is projected at a distance as if you too much have many years of hardship to even attempt to own the idea. Simply not true. Acceptance is fully contingent on the will or willingness. In your experience, see if you can note the differences between the will/willingness in an instant of pure Being and the hoping/ wishing aspect that sort of distances itself from acceptance. Once you learn that interior terrain personally, and not simply as distantiation, your purpose to affirm acceptance (out of the joy of being and bringing it!) takes hold.

Sophia, you are a perfect, unrepeatable expression of Wholeness, Source, and everything else that was added that is simply not so dissolves in every instant of pure Being in which you recognize your holiness. Accumulating those experiences and setting them apart as a demonstration to the Life that lives in you is awakening! It is the path. --Not the old belief that about not being there today is what being honest is--no,no. Your work to the ends of affirming acceptance is your joy.

You are a very lovely person. You are in a very important place. Take your time, but persevere in your affiliation with your What IS.

Much Love to You... Its been my pleasure.

Sophia said...

I think I'm starting to accept myself more lately, but I always find things that could use improvement. I am doing much better, although I occasionally fall back, but luckily I'm not falling back as much as I used to.

What would be the difference between will/willingness and hoping/wishing? If I have hope, isn't that also willingness? Or is it that hope keeps me from experiencing Now?

I don't know if I really get the concept of perservering with my affiliation of What Is. Isn't everything I do an affiliation of That? Maybe you are speaking about meditation, or silencing of the thoughts?

Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Meditation as the appreciation of what IS. That can be the work of art or it can be moments spent in direct meditative appreciation. But it is the universal applicability of the good in the work that is communicated and therefore free of limiting ideas, like sequential time. The more "time" spent in appreciation, the closer to your recognition of the nature of the heart of truth.

Sophia said...

Thanks, anonymous. I've started to give this a try, by using my silent moments before and after sleep last night and this morning, just appreciating.

Anonymous said...

The idea is then you find yourself creating art that is in essence appreciation, you find yourself forgiving yourself for not being there yet (actually choosing not to reinforce the idea that you are not there) and you are appreciating. And then you say, why would I leave the safety of appreciation for mental gymnastics. This is working so well, I'm taking good care of my inner being in this. Then when things get more tricky, you have the practice and you are stronger from the inside and you know how to depend on your saner perception. You know? Take the discipline out of the ritual and just use it indescriminantly and catches! 30 years, no way, its happening now by your own election. That's how powerful decision is. Love to you!

Sophia said...

I would like to find out what you mean by "creating art", as I am almost inclined to take this in a literal context, yet I am almost sure you mean it in the grander scheme of things.

(Sometimes lately I get in conversations with people and I start treating their words as metaphors as opposed to normal conversation and it gets confusing for me and for them; it makes me wonder if we're really communicating!)

It sounds like basically the key word here is "acceptance". Just to accept oneself (me, in this instance) as they are.

Thanks! Much love to you, too! :)