Monday, October 12, 2009

Dark Night of the Soul

It's only my concern and no one else's but I feel the need to point it out because I can't keep up with correspondences right now.


Sophia said...

I need to find out what it means for the moon to be in Leo.

I haven't felt this need for attention in a long time. Nor have I felt this depressed in a long time.

I am forcing myself to keep from actively seeking attention.

The depression is accompanied by loneliness tonight.

It's a weird unstable night but it has been progressing in this direction for a while now.

Sophia said...

The moon was in Virgo when I was born.

A clipping from a sample reading:

Your Moon is in Virgo

You are very sensitive, cautious, and shy about showing others your feelings. Though you may love and care for someone a great deal, you rarely express those feelings openly and freely. Very often your love for someone will be expressed by trying to help them, doing something tangible to benefit them, or serving them in some way.

It is also difficult for you to receive warmth, affection, or appreciation, for you often feel that you don't really deserve it or that "they don't really mean it". You can therefore seem rather cool and aloof, much more so than you feel.

A deeply ingrained critical attitude often makes you difficult to live with. You need to learn to be gentler and less of a perfectionist with others and with yourself.

V said...

We are what we believe. That's our Ego.

If you stop believing in anything what will become of you?

But sometimes it helps to believe in yourself.

V said...

Maybe you're doing something that makes you unhappy. Or that doesn't make you happy.

Quit your job. ;)

V said...

Retire early. Paint, clay-model, cook. Whatever.

Create digital art for its own sake.

V said...

Or just sit. Stare. Stop thinking.

You are energy. If it's your gone you're gone. What wrong about that. Time to rest or sleep. That's life. It's a cycle.

V said...

The mind is creative. The body as well.

Observe. Watch life unfold. Life is creative.

V said...

Try eating chips one at a time. Not all at once. The longer it takes the better. It's good!

sally said...

i think i've tried that before--
forcing myself to abstain
from something i think i'm addicted to
including attention

i'm not sure that "forcing" one's self
is the best approach
though perhaps you mean in it
in a good way
in the sense of being aware
of one's sense of craving
and simply accepting it compassionately
without judgment
but also without mindlessly acting on it

attention and human connection
are probably a basic human need
like food and water
i can imagine that
depriving one's self too much
could lead to depression and loneliness

thanks for sharing
i enjoy the honesty of your posts

sally said...

i share your desire to see the world
filled with divine love and mystery
and i've experienced the same doubts
you describe in your other post
and i've wondered about
the relationship between
psychology and spirituality

i don't have any answers
i've just realized that i am happier
and that i have more love for others
when i allow myself to believe

psychology is useful
it has its place
but it doesn't give me
everything that is need

sally said...

i meant
"everything that I need"

and on another note
when i first looked over
at your blog a few months ago
you had a slightly different
description of yourself
and i don't remember what it was
but something you had written there
made me think
"hey this girl is just like me;
that sounds like something i would write"

thanks for sharing the journey pilgrim

Sophia said...

Sally, it makes my day to know that you saw some of yourself in something I said. This is what had been in my profile, and I believe is what you spoke of:

"I'm a soul carrying around the 31 year old body of an imperfect human being. My goal is to use the experience called "Life" to learn lessons that will aid me on my spiritual journey. It has occurred to me recently that my life's purpose is to grow. "I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is 'Who in the world am I?' Ah, that's the great puzzle!" ~Alice in Wonderland"

Knowing someone sees some of themselves in my writing is what makes blogging worthwhile. Thanks.

Yes, my job at present moment is to be more aware of my self and its needs and addictions; these things I never paid attention to and I was completely unaware of until stopping to "Know Thyself".

I appreciate your comments as they help me see that others experience the same thoughts and doubts. It is always nice to know one is not alone in this.

Sophia said...

V, Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. Yes - we are what we believe and it takes really getting to know this to be conscious creators. I still don't know what that means yet but I am learning.

Thank you for being a friend these past four years. :)

sally said...

Yes, that's it, the part about using the experience called "Life" to learn lessons and life's purpose being to grow.